How to Make Gravy

E F#m 2nd fret G#m 4th fret A 5th fret B 7th fret (Open chords leave 'E', 'B' and 'E' strings open)

E  F#m  G#m  A  B
E               F#m       G#m                   F#m
Hello Dan, it's Joe here, I hope you're keeping well
E                  F#m     G#m                              F#m
It's the 21st of December, and now they're ringing the last bells
A               G#m     A                       B
If I get good behaviour, I'll be out of here by July
E                         F#m            G#m    F#m                   E   F#m   G#m  F#m
Won't you kiss my kids on Christmas Day, please don't let 'em cry for me

E                                          F#m            G#m                         F#m
I guess the brothers are driving down from Queensland and Stella's flying in from the coast
E                                  F#m                     G#m                     F#m
They say it's gonna be a hundred degrees, even more maybe, but that won't stop the roast
A                    G#m       A                         B
Who's gonna make the gravy now? I bet it won't taste the same
E                       F#m                                G#m
Just add flour, salt, a little red wine and don't forget a dollop of tomato sauce for 
F#m
sweetness and that extra tang

                    E                      F#m
And give my love to Angus and to Frank and Dolly,
                 G#m                     F#m
Tell 'em all I'm sorry I screwed up this time
               E                        F#m                  G#m
And look after Rita, I'll be thinking of her early Christmas morning
         F#m         E     F#m   G#m   F#m
When I'm standing in line 

E                       F#m        G#m                    F#m
I hear Mary's got a new boyfriend, I hope he can hold his own
E                           F#m
Do you remember the last one? What was his name again?
G#m                    F#m
(Just a little too much cologne)
A                         G#m
And Roger, you know I'm even gonna miss Roger
A                                          B
'Cause there's sure as hell no one in here I want to fight

                   E                   F#m
Oh praise the Baby Jesus, have a Merry Christmas,
                 G#m                               F#m
I'm really gonna miss it, all the treasure and the trash
                 E                   F#m
And later in the evening, I can just imagine,
                     G#m                        F#m
You'll put on Junior Murvin and push the tables back
                     E                        F#m
And you'll dance with Rita, I know you really like her,          
           G#m                                   F#m
Just don't hold her too close, oh brother please don't stab me in the back
                 E                              F#m
I didn't mean to say that, it's just my mind it plays up,
                G#m                 F#m
Multiplies each matter, turns imagination into fact
                    E                       F#m
You know I love her badly, she's the one to save me,
                    G#m                        F#m
I'm gonna make some gravy, I'm gonna taste the fat
                  E                      F#m
Tell her that I'm sorry, yeah I love her badly, 
                 G#m                       F#m
tell 'em all I'm sorry and kiss the sleepy children for me
                      E                    F#m
You know one of these days, I'll be making gravy,
               G#m               F#m         E     F#m  G#m  F#m
I'll be making plenty, I'm gonna pay 'em all back.

E  F#m  G#m  F#m  (epeat and Fade)